別緊張，我又不是什么好人。

2

如果命運扼住了你的喉嚨，那你就撓命運的胳肢窩，玩的就是出其不意！

3

你今天要是敢走出這個家門，你就別想走出家門一步。

4

世上沒有什么煩惱是一頓飯不能解決的，一頓不行就兩頓。

5

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上今天的班，補昨天的覺，花明天的錢，生活亂七八糟，卻有條不紊。

6

生活不如意之事十之八九，剩下的一二更是不堪回首。

7

我現在的狀態，胖的隨心所欲，窮的一身正氣。

8

每天唯一的運動，就是看網上的你們過得太好了，急得跳腳。

9

你不需要再賣慘了，看你的體型就知道，生活再虧待你，也虧待不到哪兒去。

X

我的福氣在后頭，就是不知道在誰后頭。

Y

說出來你可能不信，那我就不說了。

Z

人生是曠野，但是家里沒礦就別野。