深夜的書房里,臺燈在稿紙上投下光圈。作家周棠放下鋼筆,聽著窗外的雨聲。桌上的青瓷瓶插著一枝玉蘭,花瓣上的水珠正緩緩滑落。這是她堅持了二十年的獨處時刻,在文字與寂靜的對話中,整理被白天的喧囂打亂的思緒。
年輕時的周棠最怕獨處。大學宿舍熄燈后,她總要和室友聊到困意襲來才肯罷休;工作后加班到深夜,也要拉著同事繞遠路回家。直到三十歲那年,她在醫院陪護生病的母親,深夜走廊的長椅上,第一次體會到獨處的必要。“當世界被迫安靜下來,你才能聽見自己的聲音。”
現在的她,每周三會給自己放 “獨處假”。關掉手機,泡一壺白茶,坐在陽臺的藤椅上看書。陽光穿過紗簾落在書頁上,翻動紙張的聲音像海浪拍岸。有時什么也不做,就看著云朵在天上慢慢游走,感受時間在指尖流淌的質感。
她的書桌上總放著一個舊相框,里面是張空白照片。“這是留給自己的位置。” 她笑著解釋,“很多人忙著在照片里擠進各種場合,卻忘了給自己留個角落。” 獨處不是與世隔絕,而是在人群中保持清醒的自我,就像在喧鬧的集市里,依然能聽見花開的聲音。
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有次參加文學沙龍,年輕作家們討論如何在碎片化時代保持創作定力。周棠分享了自己的秘訣:每天留一小時 “電子齋戒”,不看手機不刷社交軟件。“獨處就像給心靈撣灰,” 她說著指向窗外的月亮,“你看,月亮只有在黑夜才最明亮。”
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